We’re at Wefcon 3

Sylvia Shawcross

I’ve decided and nobody seems to have thought of it yet. So I’m writing this in the hopes that some bright young technical type person will set up a website for us all so we can all finally relax about how afraid we need to be on any given day.

We can just check the website every morning with our coffee and depending on how high the level is will determine how much coffee we might drink. (Too much coffee on a high terror day is never a good combination.)

The thing is, this isn’t new— it’s just a foolish thing we did once that solved this whole problem. And it was, hold on to yer hats, CNN of all places that had it figured out. Why has everybody forgotten the “Terror Alert Banner” of CNN after 911?

Don’t you remember? There it was at the bottom of the tv screen with a bar going from green to red telling us what the terror alert was for that day. What a brilliant idea to keep us in the know as far as terror goes! (Even though when it was green we still were a bit perturbed just by the fact that a terror alert banner even existed.)


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